Posts Tagged ‘Kids’

I decided to enter a blog contest where I could when a trip to NYC for the BlogHer 2010 conference and be and write for another blog Mabel’s Label’s! Here are the requirements and my post!!

Write a post on your blog in response to the following hypothetical situation: Electrical storms are going to wipe out the Internet (perhaps forever). You have one day left to write about your passions: what do you want to say to the blogosphere in 300 words or less?

I would want moms in the blogosphere to know they’re not alone in their self doubt and there are no perfect moms. Being a mom can be a lonely place. It’s not that you don’t have friends and are isolated; moms can fool themselves into believing they’re the only mom who doubts her abilities to be a good mom.
No mom screams so much that later that day, she thinks to herself, “I must be coming down with something, my throat is so sore!”
No mom dreams of being able to throw a temper tantrum. (Three pounds? What do you mean I gained three pounds? I‘ve been eating like a rabbit for a week!!!)
Or, other moms never wish they could be pushed in the stroller with the reclining seat and her favorite blanket, receiving special snacks and drinks to be quiet.
What about a secret stash of chocolate hidden from the rest of her family, I bet no mom does that.
Ahem…I bet other moms wouldn’t get sidetracked by their struggles and the injustice in the life of a mom, while trying to write a blog about their passions….
There isn’t a perfect mom. She may look perfect, body, hair, and make-up. She may seem to have the perfect husband, handsome, thoughtful, smart, and buys her jewelry for every holiday. It may appear her children are perfect, honoring her, obeying without an argument, sharing is their favorite, and praising her for her originality in Mac-n-cheese with hotdogs in it.
Rest assured there is self doubt; and it is because of our imperfections that when the pee and poop go in the toilet or you are the shoulder for loves first heartbreak, we can relax and know we don’t need to be perfect we just need to be.

I bet there are people who live their lives never thinking to themselves…”Did I just say that out loud??” Unfortunately, for me and those around me, I am not one of those lucky few. When I celebrated Christmas this year with my family, I heard those words running through my head again!

Every Christmas, my mom, my two sisters and I, plan a day for the four of us to go to lunch together and have time away from the chaos of the kids and men! This year was no different, as we headed out to lunch the conversation turned toward my blog and my writing. This is where the brilliance happened.

I was telling them about the different ideas I had on topics I wanted to write about when I shared my most recent idea, an idea that wasn’t completely thought out, yet. “We all ruin our kids, we may not mean to and we do the best that we can but in the end, we ruin them.” Ahhh, yes…my two sisters and my MOM are in the car, remember. As my sisters heads spun around backwards simultaneously to looks at me (and with no audible words the both said, “No you did not just say that!”) I sheepishly, glanced over at my mom sitting next to me who was now repositioning herself in her seat to look at me straight on and I said “I mean we all do it….its not on purpose….”

Her response was, “Really, so tell me how your Father and I ruined you?” I glanced toward the front seat and noticed that my sisters had both become consumed by the beautiful Iowa scenery outside of the car, actually it was more like a longing to be anywhere other than in our car.

Did I mention that the idea was not completely thought out? We did survive our lunch together, there were beautiful gifts given at lunch and that helped!! I don’t know if my mom really ever understood what I meant but I will try to explain.

I have a lot of really bad habits and sinful ways. Things I am not proud of and I know without a shadow of a doubt I am passing on some of those things to my children. I could be a much better communicator. My children will learn how to communicate relationally from my husband and me. We are their examples and we are imperfect! But we are not the only ones. The only human being to be perfect was Jesus, so, I am making the leap that anyone who is a parent is going to pass on some bad habits!

Maybe ruin was too strong of a word. I truly believe that it is not intentional but that it is human nature. As parents, I know that Michael and I are doing the best that we can and are committed to keep trying and be the best examples that we can for our kids. But, we will fail at times and maybe the best thing we can do is tell our kids when we screw up and let them know it is ok to make mistakes but get right back in the race.

Establishing some type of counseling fund wouldn’t hurt either! In the end we are all damaged goods but Glory to God that we have a Savior who loves us no matter how damaged or ruined we are!!

Some days feel like all I have gathered up are missed opportunities. Missed opportunities with my kids. Good job honey, I can tell you are trying and I am proud of you. Awesome Job on the test! I knew you could do it! Way to go, you got the potty in the potty!

It happens with my husband, girl friends, sisters, neighbors and strangers too. It could be as simple as the missed opportunity of sharing a kind smile or hello. Or something deeper like the chance to connect with a loved one and forgive and forget.

It is days like these that hurt me the most. I want to build into my children, husband, other family and friends. And when I don’t, I cheat myself out of seeing the power of life giving thoughts and words.

I know that today won’t be the last day I feel this way but my prayer is that as I move through tomorrow I recognize the opportunity when it happens and that I then pull myself back on track and seize the moment!

Today is a Monday. I don’t know about you but Mondays tend to be pretty crazy for me and my family. I am going to try and start off my week staying tuned into as many opportunities that come my way today!!!

I hope you will join me!

There are days when I don’t actually like myself very much. I know who I want to be and how I want others to see me but that doesn’t seem to be who I am.

Most of my family gets to experience who I am, unfortunately. I have such big plans for the type of mom, wife, sister, daughter and friend that I want to be. It seems like most of the time I can get in a zone and be really good at one of these but the others pretty much go neglected. All to often I lose it with my kids or my husband or I share something with someone that really wasn’t my information to share!!! Ugh!

Some may say that being “aware” of this is a step in the right direction. It is just so disappointing to me. There are times when I become “aware” that I am not behaving the way my heart truly desires and I do it anyway!!!

Recently, I was trying to teach my 3 year old daughter this very basic concept, “if you know it is wrong then don’t do it.” We had just adopted a stray kitten into our family and Layla and the kitten really didn’t hit it off. Actually, there was a lot of hitting, carrying by the neck and tail pulling going on. Bet you can guess who was doing all of the abuse! One particular time when she had gotten into trouble for the hitting I told her she was not allowed to touch the kitten for the rest of the day. She looked directly at me stuck out her index finger, slowly moved toward the kitten and touched her!! She knew she wasn’t supposed to do it but she did it anyway! Sigh….

The good news is, that God forgives my failure as long as I repent and have a heart that truly desires to get it right.
Thank you Lord for loving me even though I am disobedient most of the time. I continually remind myself that who I am is, a treasured child of God!!!

Oh, and by the way, Layla and the kitten continue to work it out. It’s not perfect but the kitten seems to forgive her because every night I find the kitten snuggled up against Layla in her bed.

Ephesians 2:4-5
“But because of his great love for us, God, who is rich in mercy, made us alive with Christ even when we were dead in transgressions—it is by grace you have been saved.”

Have you ever thought you had everything planned out for the day. Get kids to school, come home, do laundry, vacuum, dust, exercise, run to grocery store, pick kids up from school, help with home work, quick dinner, get everyone to practice/games come home, give baths, help review for test tomorrow, drop into bed, zzzzzzz
But the reality for your day could be a completely different plan….plan B…God’s plan.

Recently my dad was diagnosed with prostate cancer.  It was determined to be in the early stages but complete removal of the prostrate was the recommended treatment.  The surgery was scheduled for the end of the month.  I made the necessary  arrangements to travel home for the surgery(only slightly less difficult than preparing for the launch of the next shuttle into space) and went.

After about an hour and a half into the surgery the attending nurse came out and told my mom that the surgery was finished.(not good news when at the minimum the surgery was to take three hours)  The doctor and the anesthesiologist informed us that they had not been able to intubate my dad and would need to reschedule to surgery for a later date when he could be awake and easier to intubate.

Wait….what!!! But we are all here and he is ready and it needs to happen now…its cancer…get it out of him….NOW!!!…we are not waiting…wake him up and try now!!!!

It may not be a scheduled surgery…it could be something as simple as a child waking up sick during the night and you have an important meeting the next day or something as drastic as the sudden loss of a loved one but whatever it may be that changes your plan A to plan B, are you ready?  Are you willing?

The idea that we are in control of our lives is comforting but not the truth.  God is in control and he has a plan for our lives.  Are we to sit back and wait for the perfect instructions?  Yes and No!  Yes, be available to hear God speak to you but we must also live!  Plan your life according to His Word and the instructions on how to live but be prepared to let go of those plans if he redirects you!!!

My dad had his surgery and is recovering at home.  I believe the anesthesiologist could not intubate my dad the first time because of my dad’s anatomy but I also think that God wants to teach me to take these opportunities when plan A doesn’t work out, to look for His plan.  For my mom, dad and other family members it could have been a different lesson.  The possibilities for the amount of different lessons and outcomes for all of the people involved is mind boggling.  The doctors, nurses, babysitters, who ever was involved in the procedure that day, God has plans for !!! Amazing!! Wonderful!

Our God never ceases to amaze me!

Romans 12:2 “Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.”