Posts Tagged ‘Friendship’

I am blessed with sisters, biological and chosen. I have some radical sisters. I have some conservative sisters too. Sisters who have promised to defend me even when I am wrong and who will walk beside me through all times of my life the good and the bad. They will wade into the deep water with me and help me reach dry land. My sisters will stand in the rain with me, sit in the silence with me, yell over the noise with me, and speak to my inner child like only another woman can. They will eat chocolate, drink wine and complain with me about not losing weight. My sisters will notice my new shirt, haircut or lip gloss. They will tell me when something looks good and when it doesn’t. My sisters will let me know when there is something in my teeth, my hair or nose. They pass down the word to all of my other sisters when I am hurting, make a human life line and pray with me through it all. We share our dreams of living in an all women commune together someday, where all of the dirty socks are in the hamper and the toilet seats are always left down. They remember what is important to me. They share recipes, and secret miracle cures. Some of them I have shared my whole life with and some I have known for just a little while. Some I talk to everyday and some I may have not talked to in a couple of years, but still we are sisters. None of them are exactly the same, some very different from each other, some are younger than me some are older, some are skinny some are not, some cuss and drink some would never do either of those, some have quiet voices and some scream a lot! Some are blond, brunette and red heads, and some of them have been all three. Some of them live right down the street and some a cross the country. And that is exactly how God designed it, my circle of sisters, He uses them to hug me, tickle me and wipe away my tears. They are His voice, His hands and feet. They are the reality of “you are never alone, for I am with you all the days of your life”. They are His gift to me everyday as a reminder of His love for me. They are my sisters.

I grew up in a home where sports were celebrated. All types, we were not single sport snobs. I grew up watching golf, wrestling, football, basketball, hockey, and baseball. My mom loves all sports and my grandparents were avid Hawkeye fans and fans of anything their grandkids participated in. My dad coached several different sports, everything from my T-ball teams to my brothers wrestling.

I can remember grown men coming up to my dad and telling him he was the best coach they ever had. I of course would stand a little taller, as if I had anything to do with it; I was proud of my dad and the obvious impact he had had on these men. As a grown, women and a mother of three, I am always looking for my dad’s input when it comes to the sports programs my kids are involved in or his opinion on different opportunities they have. My dad lives three hours away so any coaching opportunities he gets with my kids happen on vacations or special family holidays.

My dad gladly gave his gift of coaching to so many and I truly believe it was a gift. I have known a lot of coaches in my life and trust me, they are not all created equally!

About four years ago someone suggested a hitting coach by the name of John Maitland for my oldest son Jacob. It took me about a year to actually make the call and set up a lesson but once we had our first lesson my boys met with John weekly until this year right before Easter.

John would be the first one to admit he never really was a very good baseball player but he loved it. He was a student of the game. John loved the strategy, loved the odds of succeeding in a game of failure and loved to keep everything simple.

I will never forget the first time my son had a lesson in John’s basement, not a pretty or fancy set-up and I do remember being slightly fearful of where to sit! My son hit a few balls for John and John promptly told him where he was struggling and how he could help him improve his swing and batting average. And that is exactly what he did. You could see my son’s improvement in the batter’s box and on paper but what he gave Jacob that meant so much more to his mom, was the self confidence to believe in himself.

John was the first coach to ever spend quality one on one time with Jacob building into him. If you would have ever heard any of their conversations during a lesson you would say I’m crazy to think that, most of the lessons John was picking on the Cubs (my son’s favorite team), or Jacob’s lack of focus or the fact that he was wanted by the police in several counties….. some days it never ended….Jacob loved it and would try to plan ways he was going to “get” John, but somewhere in between all of the jokes and knocks on each other, John would say, “Now that was a nice swing and he would mean it.” And Jacob would soak it up.

I have always looked forward to the weekly lessons and my conversations with him. We would discuss everything from, his latest civil war find, the Kennedy assignation and crazy baseball parents. I will miss his advice, and sense of humor, but most of all I will miss his friendship. I don’t know if he ever realized what he gave to me as a parent when he gave Jacob his confidence in the batter’s box, he gave me confidence as a parent that even if only for a little while during a baseball game, I could relax and know my kid had found his swing.

John lost his battle with bone marrow cancer on June, 22nd 2010. He was an inspiring coach to hundreds of kids and their families. I once read what matters most in life isn’t the day you were born or the day you die, it is what you did during the dash in between those two days that matters most. Well done John and thank you.

Maybe it is all the rain and clouds or raging hormones but I have been in a negative funk the last couple of days. People smiling at me, must be laughing at me. I hear them in my mind saying,” Did you see how out of control her children are? Or “hey, the 80”s called and they want their stirrup pants, off the shoulder sweatshirt and headband back!” Just kidding I am not walking around wearing that!! I did at one time but not today.

Being positive is a struggle. I need perspective, perspective that sunshine, sand between my toes and a drink with an umbrella, can give me. Even more annoying God seems to surround me with positive people. Ugh! I know it is a good thing, like how carrots are better than a whole tub of Ben and Jerry’s Coffee Heath bar, (don’t even get me started), but sometimes it is just more depressing.

Except, when I think of my friend Kelly, she is the absolute best! One of the most hilarious people I know. We have been friends since grade school. I needed to call her the other day, and as soon as I started dialing, I was smiling. I was so excited to talk to her that I was giggling to myself.

Kelly and I have a long history of picking each other up. Well, technically, I did all of the picking up 4th thru 6th grade during indoor recess when we would make up dances to songs, I was always the “guy” and could throw her all over the place. We would force all of the boys to watch our elaborate chorography to songs like “Le Freak” or some song from Grease a new blockbuster movie. They loved it….

So now it is her turn, she picks me up emotionally. Kelly has had hardships in her life. She has had to endure things no one should have to go through. And recently, when we were talking she shared with me that, there have been times when she was mad at God, but she has always been able to come through and find peace in whatever her situation may be. She will talk to anyone, and I am guessing put a smile on their face. She will give to anyone she comes across in need. She is a true friend.

Last march, a group of my friends and I got together to celebrate the year we all turned 40, Kelly’s birthday is July 1st so that makes her one of the youngest, no wonder she was so happy! Kelly came up with the theme of our trip, “Livin the dream”! By the end of our time together we were all convinced we were “Livin the dream” no matter what our situations may be back home! She inspired all of us.

I want to be like Kelly. I want people to feel excited that they are getting ready to call me and hear my voice. I want to be a positive force to a group of woman all struggling on some level. I want to trust God enough to know that I might not like my current situation but I am willing to find peace no matter what because it is His plan. I want to find happiness in all our memories from grade school, even painful ones, like how when we would play Charlie’s Angles, they all made me be Bosley!

I’m still struggling to be positive but thinking about my dear friend has made it a little bit easier today!

Thanks for picking me up Kelly and helping me remember, I’m “Livin the dream”!

When I stop and really think of all of the women in my life and how blessed I am because I have them in my life, I am humbled.

My husband and I have lived in seven different states over the last 18 years.  We have met some of the most amazing people and made lifelong friendships along the way.  I also have two incredible biological sisters, two extraordinary sister-in-laws, a wonderful mom and a loving mother-in-law.  God has provided exactly what, who, when and where at just the right time…imagine that!

These women have encouraged me, humbled me, taught me, held me, prayed for me, cried for me and with me, laughed at me and with me, but most of all loved me!!  And I have been told, that is not always an easy thing to do!!!  It would be foolish if I didn’t mention the fact, that besides my family, my girlfriends have given me the most material to write about!!!  Thank you ladies!!

The bond between sisters biological or chosen never ceases to amaze me!  I cant wait to continue on our journey together.  It may not always be easy going but together with Christ as our guide, I know it will be life changing!!!